I am a recovering snarkaholic.
It started in college. To a certain degree, it was a defense mechanism, but it also was quite fun as I was really good at it and I found a great Snark Posse to which I belonged.
My snarkaholism has ebbed and flowed over the years. There have been times in my life where it dictated the ” timbre” of most of my relationships, and other times I tried to put it in sleep mode.
I am not going to lie – being a snark is extremely useful. It allows one to portray a certain level of intelligence and our ability to think and respond quickly often gives us an advantage.
When social media came into being, it was like a gift from the gods to us Snarkaholics.
All of a sudden, we could tap into a level of snarkdom we never thought possible!
And, along with that, we became connected with an even broader, more superior Snark Posse!
A few years ago, one of my mom’s closest and dearest friends passed away. It was difficult on all of us as Carol’s family is like our extended family.
Her funeral was absolutely remarkable. Amidst the grief of losing such a dear family friend way too early, her impact on those around her has been salient and significant.
One lady after another got up and talked about Carol’s impact on her life. As each woman shared, over and over again, examples were given of Carol’s graciousness.
As I heard story after story of how Carol’s graciousness had impacted these young women, I just felt an unbelievable, indescribable flood of emotion. The impact on me was profound. And admittedly, it took quite a while for me to work it all out.
And in doing so, this is what I realized::
Snarkiness alienates people, grace welcomes them.
Snarkiness propagates distrust, grace propagates trust.
Snarkiness highlights intelligence, but grace highlights wisdom.
I will always have a propensity for snark. And every once and a while, it has proven itself to be helpful.
But, I am proud to now be a recovering snarkaholic. I long to be more like Carol.
I long to be the type of woman that is capable of rejecting a tendency to judge or “school” another person (even if it is justifiable), still speak truthfully and with integrity, and focus on the fact that a person’s worth is far greater than my ego.